Do you want to reach out to someone?  Do you have a hard time doing so?  Do they not seem to want your help?

Those who are leaders in any industry have people they need to look after.  You are a CEO, CFO, General Manager, Executive, Manager, Supervisor, team leader, sponsor, mother, father, or whatever requires your guidance for those who look to you.  I know in my leadership positions I have had my fair share of people who do not want help, my help, or that of anyone for that matter.  There are hard people to lead.  The stubbornness of some is frustrating after awhile. I have had may experiences with these hard personalities but have had success by consistent effort to break down their walls.  And come to find out that they were struggling and really needed help but they didn’t want to ask.   Let me share a story that can illustrate this better.

A man wanted no help from any of the group members let alone the leader.  He didn’t like being “told” what to do or follow directions of another person.  To him, he was performing just fine even excelling in what he does.  He felt like he knew it all and could do it alone. His ego got bigger and bigger, soon he started moving his desk away from the group.  He went early and set his stuff in the back.  At the end of the day the leader would return his stuff in an attempt to bring him back to the group.  Nothing seemed to work, the leader talked to him, counseled him, and consulted with him.  The leader knew his performance needed to be elevated because he was not performing well, but he didn’t believe that.  He kept up the idea that he was the best.   All he replied was, “leave my stuff where I put it.”  The leader did not comply with his request because he wanted and needed him to succeed.  The man was fed up with having to move his desk so he put it where he saw best and bolted it to the ground.  “Now,” he thought, “they can’t try and force me to be in the group.”  At the end of that day the leader tried to move the desk but it would not budge.  He notice the bolts and was sad because of the rebel’s blatant disregard of his efforts to help.  The group would tell the leader daily, “why do you try so hard,” “he’s never going to listen,” “he doesn’t even do that well anyway,” “you’re wasting your time.”  The leader replied, “guys we are only as strong as our weakest link.  Whether you like it or not we are in this together.”  They admired their leader for his loving dedication and total diligence.  He thought of ways he could help his group member. A week or so passed and he was up late troubled with his lack of ability to help. Suddenly he remember something he read a time ago and it went like this, “he drew a circle that shut me out, so I drew a circle that brought him in.” He knew what he had to do.  He went and moved all the desks to surround the rebellious group member.  When he got there everyone was already sitting down waiting for him.  He stormed over to his desk and tried to pick up his desk and it didn’t budge, he forgot he bolted it where it was.  He had no where to go.  After he struggled with his desk he broke down due to the love he could not deny anymore.  He finally got the help he knew he needed but didn’t want.  His performance soon increased dramatically.

As a leader you’ll have a difficult person to work with but that doesn’t mean you should focus less on them to avoid the hassle.  Those that are not problems will be fine with a little less focus so you can lift the fallen one.  Leaders are to look out for every individual.  The ones who need help are those who resist it the most.  You’re not a leader because you are better than anyone but because you exercise the gifts your Heavenly Father gave you.  And others don’t know how, therefore you are obligated to help them find out what their gifts are and how to employ them.  A leader leads on the front lines of the battlefield.

Get to know yourself then forget yourself and serve those you lead.

be happy.